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He won’t follow me on Twitter! or Instagram! or Snapchat! What an ass….SIDH
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She’s too pretty to be trusted. I don’t think she’s cheated on me… but I know she will…SIDH
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I found out that she keeps our adopted son in a dog cage when I’m at work. So I want to the police first….and then:…SIDH
(+1 rating, 1 votes)
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My boyfriend put a mousetrap on my alarm clock, so when I hit it in the morning to put it on snooze…. WHACK!…SIDH
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He is OBSESSED with drawing snails… it’s F’ed up. I mean I guess it’s better than drawing dicks.. but still strange…SIDH
(+532 rating, 590 votes)
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My girlfriend got mad at me cuz I made her chocolate milk too weak. Then she called me weak. And then proceeded to throw the chocolate milk at me. Turns out her underlying anger wasn’t really about strength of the chocolate milk. She wanted strawberry nesquick instead. Definition of crazy….SIDH
(+299 rating, 451 votes)
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When he said he was going to “chem lab” while at college, he was actually selling crack cocaine….SIDH
(+798 rating, 961 votes)
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He supposedly was “sleep walking” and shaved all the hair off my dog… it looked like a damn rat after….SIDH
(+153 rating, 288 votes)
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She parked my car under a huge tree during Hurricane Sandy and of course it ended up falling on my car…. typical move by her….SIDH
(+26 rating, 190 votes)
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She looks like Scarlett Johansson, but has the voice of a 60 year old….SIDH
(+384 rating, 423 votes)
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I told him his dong was just a little smaller than my X-boyfriend’s…SHDM
(+67 rating, 143 votes)
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He told me I had a bigger forehead than Christina Ricci….SIDH
(+42 rating, 49 votes)
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