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She’s too pretty to be trusted. I don’t think she’s cheated on me… but I know she will…SIDH
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I found out that she keeps our adopted son in a dog cage when I’m at work. So I want to the police first….and then:…SIDH
(+1 rating, 1 votes)
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My girlfriend got mad at me cuz I made her chocolate milk too weak. Then she called me weak. And then proceeded to throw the chocolate milk at me. Turns out her underlying anger wasn’t really about strength of the chocolate milk. She wanted strawberry nesquick instead. Definition of crazy….SIDH
(+299 rating, 451 votes)
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She parked my car under a huge tree during Hurricane Sandy and of course it ended up falling on my car…. typical move by her….SIDH
(+26 rating, 190 votes)
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She looks like Scarlett Johansson, but has the voice of a 60 year old….SIDH
(+384 rating, 423 votes)
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I told him his dong was just a little smaller than my X-boyfriend’s…SHDM
(+67 rating, 143 votes)
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I threw up on her in the cab ride home from a party. Then she yelled at ME, even though it was an accident!…SIDH
(+16 rating, 43 votes)
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I jokingly told my German shepherd to attack him, and it did! WOOOPPSS! It mauled his hand and leg, which later got infected….SHDM
(+1111 rating, 1,298 votes)
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She bit my nipple really hard when we were making out and it started bleeding like crazyyyy….SIDH
(+453 rating, 455 votes)
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